For Landmarks Training Weekend, Jenny has kindly shared her story about how running has supported her mental health and helped her to grieve, after losing her husband Andrew in 2020.

Jenny's Reason for running

"I'm a clinical pharmacist in North Yorkshire with two children. I was never a runner, and after I broke my pelvis age 18 after a horse riding accident, I was advised not to run. I followed this advice for the next (almost) 20 years! I have always enjoyed exercise though, for the social and mental health benefits; I was a keen horse rider for many years and also enjoyed walking, cycling and regular Pilates classes.

Andrew and I married in 2016 and we'd been together for 4 years prior to this. Andrew was a wonderful man; he was kind, loyal, fiercely intelligent and we laughed a lot together. Before the children were born we could often be found going on long walks or bike rides at the weekend, especially if they included a pub or cafe stop! We really enjoyed each other's company and being out in the countryside together. We were lucky enough to have two amazing children, Henry who was born in 2017 and Hattie, born in 2019.

My wonderful life as I knew it came to an abrupt end on Sunday 10th May 2020. It was covid-19 lockdown and we used to take it in turns to go out for a bike ride during the children's nap time. That particular Sunday, it was Andrew's turn. He set off but never came home; the last thing I said to him as he left was to stay safe and that I loved him.

Losing my husband in this way is the most traumatic thing that I have ever experienced, and I have struggled with grief and it's impact on my mental health since then. I have had a lot of fantastic support from friends and family, and also JustB and Brake, but it was fresh air and exercise that really got me breathing again. In the first horrendous days, my Dad would drag me out of the house for a walk in the evening when the children were in bed - it was a literal reminder to me to keep putting one foot in front of the other, to keep going for the sake of myself and my children. I am so grateful he made me take those first steps - as time progressed, I walked further and further, I genuinely think it kept me sane; the fresh air and thinking time was invaluable. 

Running was a progression of this walking, and it started when, as a family, we decided to try out our local junior Parkrun in Harrogate. Sundays are tricky days, so it was so beneficial to have an activity we could do together, in the fresh air and in an amazingly supportive environment. The only problem was that I could barely run 2k and could no way keep up with Henry! I started Couch25K and haven't looked back since. I found running to be even better for my mental health than just walking, plus it gave me thinking time if I needed it, and also offered a distraction from my thoughts as well. I love how I can get out in the fresh air, take deep breaths, and push myself just when I need it, to go on to achieve great things. I also love the feeling when I've done a run, whether it's 2k or 10k, I always feel better for going. It helps me feel more positive, stay in the moment and not let myself get overwhelmed. I recommend movement, fresh air and especially running to anyone who'll listen to me!


I'm not a fast runner but I have built up my distances; I was terrified at my first 10k as to whether I would get round and now I'm entered for a half marathon! Andrew wouldn't recognise me being able to run like this, and I like to think that I've made him proud."

We also got the opportunity to ask Jenny some questions about training and how she keeps motivated.
 

What is your biggest motivation to run?

Mostly for me and my mental health but the reason I try to keep myself fit & healthy both mentally & physically is so that I can be the best Mummy I can be to Henry & Hattie. I am their only surviving parent so it's vitally important to me that I'm there for them however they need me.

What's one thing you wish you knew about training before you started?

That progression isn't linear. I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis the year after Andrew was killed so I have to manage that on top of my training. If it's flaring, I can't run far or fast and I've had to learn that I need to give my body time to rest and recuperate. It's really frustrating feeling like I'm taking a backwards step in my training, but I've learnt how important it is in the long run to listen to my body.

Have you done any running events before? If so, what have you done? If not, why now, why the LLHM?

So far, I have done a handful of park runs (and quite a few junior park runs!) and three 10k runs. So not much experience with running events. I set myself the challenge of running a half marathon and a friend told me LLHM is a really lovely one to start with, so I set my sights on that and was absolutely delighted to get a place! I'm really looking forward to running past all the iconic landmarks, hopefully they'll provide a welcome distraction as well!!

What are you most looking forwards to about LLHM?

Making my children proud of me, I want to feel proud of myself as well for achieving something I never thought possible, and I like to think I'm making Andrew proud too. I'm also looking forward to the atmosphere and meeting like minded (slow!) runners like me.